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[theshabbiestofmen]

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[doggedly]

[Wow Remus what a wet blanket. Immediately, a little scowl comes over his face, and he scratches at his nose.]

That's different. She hasn't any actual brothers--just guardians and things. It won't be near as bad. [And a father, though he leaves that unsaid. No need to give Remus extra ammunition, right?]

[theshabbiestofmen]

Guardians with direwolves, I should remind you. Guardians who come from a world where courting girls is still a thing.

[doggedly]

So I'll court her!

[He sits back, quite pleased with himself. Job well done, Sirius!]

[theshabbiestofmen]

You will court her.

[doggedly]

You know, there really isn't any need to sound so shocked. Or for you to look at me like that. I'm perfectly capable!

[theshabbiestofmen]

Capable, yes, inclined, no. When have you ever dated a girl! Dated, not simply strung her along.

[doggedly]

Just because I'm not married!

[Which isn't really answering the question, but he fills it in with a load of scoffing.]

Perhaps this is a test, did you ever think of that! No, 'course you didn't, as you were too busy criticising me to even think of thinking of such a thing.

[theshabbiestofmen]

A test of what!

[doggedly]

Me! My, er, abilities! My strength of will--oh, come off it, she's a girl and I like her, and that ought to be enough, yeah?

[theshabbiestofmen]

Just don't hurt her, Sirius. I don't think she's built to handle it.

[doggedly]

Hurt her! Just who d'you think I am! I'm more than a little insulted, Moony, I don't mind telling you. I'm not out to hurt anyone.

[theshabbiestofmen]

No, but you will anyway, once you're bored of her.

[doggedly]

I'd really much rather you simply pat me on the back and tell me to get to it, y'know. That would be much better than this lecture.

[theshabbiestofmen]

When have you ever known me to pat you on the back and tell you to get to it?

[doggedly]

I was sort of hoping that you'd come around in your old age....

[theshabbiestofmen]

And I'd once hoped you'd someday mature, but it isn't to be.

[doggedly]

[He snorts.]

Oh, come off it. Me? I mean, my hope was vaguely possible, whereas yours is just mental.

[theshabbiestofmen]

You did from first year to fifth. I'd rather hoped the process would continue on.

you might even say he's ARRESTED in development.....

[doggedly]

Nah, sorry. Stuck comfortably here in my development, that's me!

Shamefully I laughed.

[theshabbiestofmen]

It's a wonder anyone but me puts up with you.

probably b/c i am very funny

[doggedly]

You're a wonder.

eh

[theshabbiestofmen]

Flattery will get you nowhere, you know.

you shut your face girl

[doggedly]

You're a liar, darling. Cleverest darling, favourite cleverest darling Moony my darling my love.

ehhhh

[theshabbiestofmen]

As I said: nowhere. I don't know why you think they'll work now; they didn't work while we were in Hogwarts together.

SHUT THAT 'OLE IN YOUR FACE

[doggedly]

Nostalgia, I thought. And they work sometimes. "That's a lovely jumper"--ooh, doesn't that one make your heart swell!