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[theshabbiestofmen]

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[theshabbiestofmen]

No one said you had to eat them. Let's hear it, then! What's your great idea?

[doggedly]

Well, yes, but if I'm promise food I sort of expect it to be a food that I want to eat. Mad, I know.

[Still, he settles down on the floor, shoving the sleeves of his jumpsuit up his arms a bit before extracting a list from his pocket. In the lore of the Marauders, lists feature very highly as sacred objects. Some of the best pranks have come from mere lists. Sirius holds it reverently before his face a moment.]

Right. So. We could start with the basics, humorously sticky floors....

[theshabbiestofmen]

Perhaps right outside the Jump room door?

[He gives him a little smile. Fussy or not, Remus still is a Marauder, at the end of the day.]

There's also always false doors and the like-- though we might be into trouble with that one.

[doggedly]

[Yes, this is more like it. That is a Marauder smile. It could be a better Marauder smile, more devious-like, but there is time for that later.]

I don't see how we'd be in trouble. If we're careful enough, people will blame all of it on the ship itself, false doors especially.

[theshabbiestofmen]

Well, yes, but I don't want them getting paranoid that someone is attacking them again.

[doggedly]

We'll leave little hearts. 'Just joking!' they'll all say. 'Love, from fellow passengers and not the ship at all ha ha ha this is a joke'. Will that help ease your mind?

[theshabbiestofmen]

There's no need for sarcasm, you know, simply because I don't want to terrify our fellow passengers.

[doggedly]

Well, you come up with something, then! Contribute, Moony!

[theshabbiestofmen]

I did, if you recall-- but all right, yes.

[He bites his thumbnail, thinking.]

What about-- oh, I don't know. Illusions? Animals? It might be amusing to see how people react to an army of squirrels running rampant.

[doggedly]

[He collapses backwards, with a huuuuuge sigh.]

No! No! No no no no--that can't be the Marauder's first prank, no!

[theshabbiestofmen]

Oh, I'm so sorry I'm not performing up to expectation-- give us time, Sirius, we'll come up with something.

[doggedly]

We don't have time. I mean, we do, of course we do, but we don't have time to take with pranks. Have you forgotten everything that we stand for? Mice or men, Moony!

[theshabbiestofmen]

Yes, yes, yes--

[He rolls his eyes, quite unimpressed with the dramatics.]

What about . . . hm. Something to do with the showers, and changing people. We could change everyone's hair and skin tone.

[doggedly]

[He considers Remus with a superior, thoughtful air.]

Better, yeah. Better. That's thinking. Or snow out of the showers.

[theshabbiestofmen]

Or both. Or snow out of certain showers, but ones that switch-- so as soon as they went to another stall, oh, well, that one is putting out snow as well.

[doggedly]

Or lizards!

[theshabbiestofmen]

Spiders?

CANS

[doggedly]

Really, Remus! Some people are afraid of spiders.

HAHA

[theshabbiestofmen]

Yes, that's rather what makes it amusing.

[doggedly]

This from the fellow saying we ought not to terrify people. Would you please make up your mind on that, I'd like to know if I'm allowed to make terrifying suggestions or only regular ones.

[theshabbiestofmen]

We're allowed to be terrifying as long as people don't think it's the ship trying to kill them-- honestly, Sirius.

[doggedly]

Don't say honestly Sirius as if that were some clear fact. You have to tell me the rules, you can't just make them and then say honestly, Sirius, it's not on.

Fine, then. Spiders. Mice.

[theshabbiestofmen]

[He sighs, but doesn't comment on that bit of unfairness. Instead he leans forward.]

The problem will be timing. We can't possibly get there before anyone else.

[doggedly]

[He sucks in a breath, wrinkling his nose in disgust.]

Yeah, I'd thought of that. Maybe some sort of time-delay thing, d'you think?

[theshabbiestofmen]

That might be complicated. We could try something with simply shutting off the showers for a while. Turning off the water, I mean, and then waiting until people clear out to work on them. It would be a delayed surprise, but one that gives us more time to work.