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[the first bit doesn't even get an answer. no he most certainly is not James and that's obvious.]

just all right

I don't know. It's bizarre, all right. And I don't know what to think of him.

What about you?

well youve said it
hes not james

[That seems terribly unfair to say, and Sirius stares at the words for a few moments after he's written them.]

i dunno
its just weird knowing what we know and then talking to him
that and he seems fairly normal which youd think perhaps he wouldnt be
not that i want him to be absolutely mental its just

i dunno

That's rather how I feel about it.

[A beat.]

It's . . . weird. Unpleasant, almost.

if hes here then it happens
right

Not necessarily. There are a hundred different variations-- and he could be from a timeline that no longer exists.

so whys it unpleasant then

Because he's a reminder of what might happen should we fail.

[Well. That's horrible. He stares at the words for a few moments before he answers--trying, stupidly, for a joke.]

oh thats unfair
hes not that bad weve only just met him

[But it sounds idiotic even when he reads it to himself, so he adds:]

yeah. youre right.

[A long bit of quiet, and then:]

He's so much older seeming. Not just in age, but personality.

do you think thats because

i mean he doesnt know us yet not actually or he does but were older
so maybe its down to that

He's also been through a war. A bad one, from all indications.

yeah i suppose

i dont know remus i always reckoned on someone from our time coming
i never thought about
i mean thats stupid i know but i didnt think about it

Nor did I. Which is stupid; Merlin is here, clearly people from the past or future can come-- but I never expected someone from our future. So intimately connected.

[A pause.]

I thought he was James at first.

[At that, he laughs, bitterly--and there's a pause in return before he answers.]

i did too
stupid isnt it
he looks precisely like him except you know his eyes
merlin but this is mental

[Another little pause, and he adds:] i wonder if james will show up

Edited (heh HTML) 2013-03-22 13:29 (UTC)

I don't know if I want him to. I don't want to have to tell him about any of this.

not even if it means seeing him again
i mean what if this is it remus
what if we dont go back at all

[And then suddenly there's Remus' voice, fierce:]

That's not going to happen!

[He pauses a moment before answering, but then switches over as well--tired, worn out.]

But if it does.

It won't. Plenty of people have gone back! There's no reason why we shouldn't!

But not gone back to say. Remus, listen to me, would you. If there can be alternate timelines--if our decision to change things with, with Harry, with all of it--to stop James from dying-- well, what the hell stops this from being some alternate bloody timeline?

[He listens, yes-- and he knows the logic of what Sirius is saying, of what he means, and of course it's possible--

--but there's a panicked little knot in the pit of his stomach that refuses to consider even briefly what Sirius is saying.]

Because I refuse to let it. I'm not going to-- we're not living here. None of us. All right? We're going to damn well find a way off here.

[It helps, to hear Remus so convinced of this. It helps to hear anyone so convinced, because at his worst, Sirius can come to doubt their eventual escape--because it seems so untrue, because they've been here for so long without any end in sight.

There's a moment of silence, and then he laughs, grimly.]

Swear?

Swear.

[He says that too firmly, too sharply-- and perhaps Sirius can see through that, but perhaps he can't.]

I won't let that happen. Nor will Lily-- o you.

[Perhaps he can. But if they both convince one another of the truth of it--if they can each bolster the other--then perhaps it will come true. Perhaps it will be all right.

So he sucks in a breath, a little shaky--though he tries to disguise that.]

All right.

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theshabbiestofmen - 2013-03-24 20:25 (UTC) - Expand

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doggedly - 2013-03-24 22:36 (UTC) - Expand