theshabbiestofmen | ic contact;

It's complicated. For eleven years Voldemort had disappeared, had gone into hiding, and everyone thought he was dead. It was only about six years ago that he even came back, so for eleven of the last years... No one knew anything. We thought we were safe.

[ She says the name without hesitation, now, making herself a little more comfortable before she breathes out. This is easier; telling Remus about the good thing, the happier things, the things that make things better - she can do that. Swallowing back her fear she makes herself more comfortable, pressing against his side again, giving herself that brief moment of comfort. ]

Things are good. People are happy, everyone is so relieved, we're ready to begin again and make the world a better place. That's what I wanted to do - to make the world better, as much as I could. I'm just one person, of course, but still.

[ She smiles, softly. ]

Last time I saw you, in our world, you were going to find your son.

[That's far easier to believe-- the first parts, anyway, about a lull in the war, that things calm down a little. It's far easier to believe; far easier to deal with. There is a break, even if they all don't make it-- some of them will.

It's a pity she tells him she has a son-- because he would like to know more of her, to explore that one little sentence. To make the world better, and he wants to understand, to know this girl who has seen as much war as he has and still manages to say that. And he will, later-- but for now--]

I have a son?

[He'd just told Sasuke children were impossible, but-- perhaps it's possible. If there's a potion to keep him tame every month, perhaps there's a way to prevent his condition from passing.]

You do. His name is Teddy - it's short for Edward, more of a nickname than anything else. Edward Remus Lupin. Harry is his Godfather.

[ Being able to give good news instead of bad is a relief and she breathes out, watching Remus for a long moment. She knows so much about him, spent so much time with him, cared for him so much and now... Now she feels adrift, as if she's walking through a fog. How much would be too much? She wants to be closer to him but she doesn't want to scare him away.

Instead, she makes herself comfortable, her expression calming as she considers. ]

He's very handsome, considering that he's a baby.

[He laughs, and it's as disbelieving as it is joyful.]

Edward . . .

[Teddy. Teddy Lupin, his son, and it's so hard to believe. Who would marry a werewolf? Who would breed with one? And yet someone, somewhere, had found him worthy enough to consent to that. He knows better than to ask who, but god, he wonders.

He glances over at her, now, a wide smile on his face.]

And here I thought Harry was going to be the only baby I ever cared for.

It's so strange to think of Harry as a baby.

[ Her nose wrinkles and she fights back her laughter. To Remus Harry would've been barely into his toddler years, just on the brink of fighting Voldemort for the first time and living because of Lily's sacrifice. She doesn't mention any of that, of course, and instead sh turns and moves closer to Remus, resting her head against his shoulder and breathing out.

A part of her wishes she could tell him more, wishes she could admit it all, but she can't. She keeps her silence because she refuses to hurt him more than she already has. ]

He's grown up a lot, though. You should see him, Remus. He's amazing - absolutely amazing.

Tell me about him.

[He hesitates for a moment at her head on his shoulder-- but it's like Sirius, really, or James. Entirely innocent. He relaxes beneath her, settling in, pleased their hands are still connected.]

Does he play Quidditch? I can't imagine James doesn't push that, frankly-- is he good in school?

[He knows Harry must be caught up in this war, same as Hermione, same as all of them-- but he wants to hear the normal things. He wants to pretend, just for a moment, that Harry gets to have a normal childhood.]

[ She doesn't show any hint of moving to give him space, simply enjoying being close to someone she cares about all over again. It had been a long time - and she forgets the fact that this isn't the Remus that she knew and he probably finds it strange to be so close to a stranger. ]

Of course he plays Quidditch. He's the Gryffindor Seeker, actually, and he becomes captain as well. He joined the team in his first year, which was utterly ridiculous and so dangerous but he managed it.

[ Softening for a moment, she breathes out and shifts, making herself more comfortable against his side as she reminisces. ]

He'd be better if he actually paid attention in most of his classes, but he was amazing at Defence Against the Dark Arts.

[His own favorite subject. Remus allows himself to fantasize for a moment-- was it he who influenced that? Had he taught Harry anything? He can't imagine James and Lily didn't pass on their gifts to him, James tutoring him in transfiguration, Lily showing him how charms worked-- but perhaps there's a very small bit of Remus there as well.

But-- he glances down at what he can see of Hermione, a little smile quirking on his lips.]

No wonder we're friends, if that's what you think of Quidditch. I used to sit in the stands while Sirius and James were at practice-- I can't tell you the number of times I swore they were going to end up killing themselves because they just had to do stupid stunts.

[A beat, and then, with a little sigh:]

It only got worse when James began to fancy Lily.

[ Hermione knows very well that the personal tutoring and the incredible lessons that Harry and Remus had in their third year had shaped at least part of his love of the subject, there's no denying that. It's not as though Gildeory or Umbridge had much in the way of inspiration running through their veins, after all, and even she had loved the more adventurous means of teaching, even if she had figured out Remus' secret almost too quickly.

She had kept it, though, and she would continue to keep it. She loved him, cared for him, and she would never let anything harm him. ]

Oh, the amount of times I watched Harry get hit around or fall off his broom... It was a nightmare. At least Harry was clever enough not to try and show off too much - there's only so much you can do when you're watching and not up there with him.

[ She huffs a noise, shaking her head. ]

I can only imagine. Boys are idiots when they fancy someone. [ Um. ] Excluding current company, of course.

[He laughs, though, and leans against her.]

I'm flattered, if not a touch disbelieving. Is it Harry that caused that opinion, or someone else?

Every single boy in Gryffindor Tower was like that.

[ Ron, too, and she thinks of him with a kind of fond nostalgia - it's been three years, and that feels like eons. She's so old now, all grown up, and remembering her jealousy and irritation when it came to Won-Won... She feels like a grouch. ]

Maybe that's just a part of being a teenager.

And thank god neither of us are that any longer.

[The worst years! Although that could be taken a little oddly, he thinks, given they're cuddled up together-- and so he adds:]

In any case: Sirius was always far too charming by half with those things. If he was ever lovesick, I never caught wind of it.

And yet I still had boys being idiots around me, flirting and proposing and making total prats of themselves. I'd like to think that most of them grow up, though.

[ Ah, well, she settles against him all the same, ignoring memories of Dorian and Gilgamesh and focussing on him instead. ]

I only know a little bit of Sirius when he was younger, honestly, thanks to you. He did seem quite... Charming, to everyone, not just someone he might have fancied. It must have been a part of who he was.

Oh, yes.

[He murmurs that softly. He shouldn't think about Sirius, really, because that got him into trouble before-- but it's so easy to talk about him.]

Even to his friends. I think it was part of him, honestly, one of those things he really didn't know how to turn off. I swear I skived off at least half a hundred essays because he charmed me.

That sounds a lot like Harry. You should have seen me in my first year - the very idea of breaking the rules was terrifying, and by fifth I was lying to teachers and luring them into the Forbidden Forest to be kidnapped by centuar.

[ Hermione smiles all the same, shaking her head and shifting, making herself more comfortable and squeezing Remus' hand. For the first time in weeks she feels like she's at home here on the fleet and she knows it's his company, even if she is more foreign to him than he is to her. ]

He really - [ was ] - is charming. It's one of the things I remember best.

Sorry-- you did what to one of your teachers?

She deserved it! She refused to teach us anything practical about Defence Against the Dark Arts, rounded us up and threatened to use truth potion on Harry against his will! It wasn't my fault she offended the centaurs - I just wanted to get her away from her office so the others could contact Sirius.

[ Huff. ]

She was a vile, evil, nasty little woman.

[Another awful little fact from the war. Though the fact things get so bad the second time round that even Hogwarts is effected-- Remus' smile goes a little forced.]

Well. Suppose you showed her.

Our track record of teachers in Defence wasn't amazing, other than you. We had a man who carried a part of Voldemort, a liar who wiped people's memories, a polyjuiced Death Eater, Umbridge, Professor Snape... And I wasn't there for seventh year.

[ She sighs. ]

The position was cursed - literally.

Bloody hell-- by whom!

Who do you think?

[ She shakes her head. ]

We were lucky to have you in third year. You really were the best teacher.

It just seems an oddly petty thing for him to do.

[Whatever! The future is weird!]

Still. Glad to know I actually do have a chance as a teacher.

I think he wanted the job - or he wanted to be inside Hogwarts somehow. Some of the most important objects he'd ever touched were there, artefacts of sorts.

[ Because there is no way Hermione is going to tell Remus all the things she knows about Horcruxes - especially not after the books she forced herself to read. ]

You were an excellent teacher, Remus, I promise. Both at Hogwarts and in the Drabwurld.

[Well, that makes a bit more sense, albeit still really weird. Of all the atrocities Remus attributed to Voldemort, fucking around with people's jobs is . . . well. It's weird, and he's not going to think about it. Instead:]

What did I teach there? In Drabwurld, I mean.

[He knows so little about that place.]

The magic from home, mostly. You asked for a library filled with books to help teach others, and you and I together were working to try and gather wands so people could learn.

[ She closes her eyes, smiling for a moment. ]

It was in a tower in the Citadel, rising high and spacious, a lot like the Defence office at Hogwarts. There were more books than I think you imagined there would be, and loads of room for all the students that might want to learn - and there were a handful, all of them our friends. It was really... Nice.

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